On June 1, we welcomed our fifth child, and fourth son, into our family. He is precious, perfect, and completely amazing from the tips of his strawberry blonde hair to the end of his ten tiny toes. Of course, as many of you know, birth order matters little; a baby changes everything.

I thought that the baby would come and that my mothering skills would kick into overdrive and I could still do everything. Instead my nine-year-old daughter helps me with everything from diapering to meal prep to laundry. She’s learning valuable life skills and to serve others.

I told the kids I would shuttle them to nearby trails where they could go for long bike rides while I pushed the baby in the stroller. Instead they ride up and down the driveway dozens of time each day. They’re learning to be adaptable.

I hoped the baby would take long naps in his crib and I could use those times to accomplish the dozens of other tasks assigned to me in a given day. Instead he sleeps best in my arms, snuggled into my chest. He’s learning to feel safe and that momma is always there.

I assured the kids we would spend every day out in the pool splashing our way through summer. Instead the filter motor is damaged so dad invented an epic water slide using our swing set slide a hose and a cheap inflatable pool. They’re learning that daddy always has the best ideas.

I figured having four other kids would mean that I could maintain control of our schedule despite adding another little one to the flock. Instead lunch is served late nearly every day, dad often takes care of dinner once he gets home from a full day of work and everyone, even the four-year-old, takes turns holding the baby. We are learning to stick together as a family and to put others’ needs before our own.

I worried that we wouldn’t be able to make the most of our precious short summer and the kids would look back in disappointment. Instead we’re making the most of our own backyard. Every raspberry picked is a bounty and every toad caught is an adventure. We’re learning to be flexible and find joy in the ordinary.

This summer isn’t going as I planned. Most days don’t, do they mommas? Some days I fight back tears thinking I have let everyone – my older kids, the baby, my husband, myself – down, but I try to remind myself that in these moments of changed plans and modified expectations, we are all learning valuable lessons. The greatest lesson of all being that we are never truly in charge of our days and that we need to take what comes with graceful, thankful hearts, embracing each bump as a blessing.